So this morning started off with a rush to get ready for work as we overslept (for Simone's schedule, not for mine).... quick shower.... quick hairwash.. get dressed.... out the door... 0655. I decided it was best to go to work and check my e mails rather than take Simone, come home and go back half an hour later.
5 minutes after arriving I received a message from Simone. The patient wasn't ready to have their chest closed, so he wanted coffee. We met in the canteen and had a coffee then left the canteen and went our separate ways.....
So hopefully you've been following the blog, and you are aware of this whole "have you had breakfast?" "what did you have for breakfast" conversation that ensues every single morning.... As I have said previously my lies are becoming more and more elaborate.... some days I have toast, other days fruit, other days cereal and other days eggs... I'm fast running out of 'breakfast' items. BUT I hate eating breakfast, I NEVER eat breakfast, and neither does Simone, hence the lies.
Well today, it went to a whole new level. After Simone and I went our separate ways.... I was in the lift and received this message
So now we are having to give each other the heads up on what we have supposedly eaten..... otherwise our lies are going to be discovered. Lucky Simone had text me, cause I was in cath lab and one of the sisters said
"you had breakfast?"
"yes I have"
"what did you have"
And up pipes Pradeep...."I know what she had, she had bread with jam"
Now if Simone had not told me that he'd seen him, my reaction would have been "no I didn't, I had scrambled eggs" but thankfully my response was "how on earth do you know?"
People say we will 'discover ourselves' in India..... I can tell you now that I am fast 'discovering' that Simone and I are great liers :) about bloody breakfast and lunch.. This is what our lives have become.
I missed lunch with Simone today, as we were mid-case in cath lab and he was between cases in theatre, so he went alone. I told him I wouldn't make it in time as he had only 20 mins. After our case finished we transferred the patient up to CICU. As we were heading for the doors, I could see someone white, in doctor scrubs heading towards us... 'must be Simone' I thought... and sure enough it was... He didn't stop and neither did I but in passing I realised he was holding up his scrub trousers.. and he looked harassed...
"They've broken" he said in passing..
The realisation dawned on me a few seconds later.... the drawstring had broken on the trousers........... and with that I could not stop giggling to myself... All I could imagine was his scrub trousers falling down in theatre mid-surgery... and all the lovely scrub nurses (who are fascinated by him because he's white) got a birds-eye view of his white arse......
I'm sure this is not how it happened... but it made me laugh anyway.... I am still to find out the whole story of how exactly this drama unfolded as he is still in work... perhaps with a very red-face..
And finally I'll tell you a conversation that Simone and I had a few days ago...
So the sanitary system here in India is not the best, I have to say. The toilets are mostly as they are in the UK, but NONE of them have toilet roll..... So whereby in UK I never left the house without my lipstick, in India, I never leave the house without toilet roll.....
At the side of every toilet is what I can only describe as a 'shower head'.... and quite often you go in to a toilet cubicle and the whole floor is completely wet... Now those of you with any sense will probably understand how the Indians wipe their arses....... right?
"There is never any toilet roll in the toilet, it's so annoying" Simone
"Of course there isn't, they don't use toilet roll" Lou
"Of course they use toilet roll, how else would they wipe their arses?" Simone
"What do you think the shower head at the side of EVERY toilet is for?" Lou
"THAT'S instead of a toilet brush.... they use water to clean the toilet" Simone
"And why is there no toilet roll?"
"I assumed that they don't poo in public toilets, they wait until they're at home"
So in a country with limited sanitation where dysentery and other diarrhoea inducing diseases are rife, Simone thinks they only poo in the comfort of their own home....
"No No NO they DO NOT use that shower head to clean their bums".....
And so, he wouldn't believe me, we had to resort to google to understand whether the shower head is an alternative to a toilet brush....
Ciao for now.... xxx
5 minutes after arriving I received a message from Simone. The patient wasn't ready to have their chest closed, so he wanted coffee. We met in the canteen and had a coffee then left the canteen and went our separate ways.....
So hopefully you've been following the blog, and you are aware of this whole "have you had breakfast?" "what did you have for breakfast" conversation that ensues every single morning.... As I have said previously my lies are becoming more and more elaborate.... some days I have toast, other days fruit, other days cereal and other days eggs... I'm fast running out of 'breakfast' items. BUT I hate eating breakfast, I NEVER eat breakfast, and neither does Simone, hence the lies.
Well today, it went to a whole new level. After Simone and I went our separate ways.... I was in the lift and received this message
So now we are having to give each other the heads up on what we have supposedly eaten..... otherwise our lies are going to be discovered. Lucky Simone had text me, cause I was in cath lab and one of the sisters said
"you had breakfast?"
"yes I have"
"what did you have"
And up pipes Pradeep...."I know what she had, she had bread with jam"
Now if Simone had not told me that he'd seen him, my reaction would have been "no I didn't, I had scrambled eggs" but thankfully my response was "how on earth do you know?"
People say we will 'discover ourselves' in India..... I can tell you now that I am fast 'discovering' that Simone and I are great liers :) about bloody breakfast and lunch.. This is what our lives have become.
I missed lunch with Simone today, as we were mid-case in cath lab and he was between cases in theatre, so he went alone. I told him I wouldn't make it in time as he had only 20 mins. After our case finished we transferred the patient up to CICU. As we were heading for the doors, I could see someone white, in doctor scrubs heading towards us... 'must be Simone' I thought... and sure enough it was... He didn't stop and neither did I but in passing I realised he was holding up his scrub trousers.. and he looked harassed...
"They've broken" he said in passing..
The realisation dawned on me a few seconds later.... the drawstring had broken on the trousers........... and with that I could not stop giggling to myself... All I could imagine was his scrub trousers falling down in theatre mid-surgery... and all the lovely scrub nurses (who are fascinated by him because he's white) got a birds-eye view of his white arse......
I'm sure this is not how it happened... but it made me laugh anyway.... I am still to find out the whole story of how exactly this drama unfolded as he is still in work... perhaps with a very red-face..
And finally I'll tell you a conversation that Simone and I had a few days ago...
So the sanitary system here in India is not the best, I have to say. The toilets are mostly as they are in the UK, but NONE of them have toilet roll..... So whereby in UK I never left the house without my lipstick, in India, I never leave the house without toilet roll.....
At the side of every toilet is what I can only describe as a 'shower head'.... and quite often you go in to a toilet cubicle and the whole floor is completely wet... Now those of you with any sense will probably understand how the Indians wipe their arses....... right?
"There is never any toilet roll in the toilet, it's so annoying" Simone
"Of course there isn't, they don't use toilet roll" Lou
"Of course they use toilet roll, how else would they wipe their arses?" Simone
"What do you think the shower head at the side of EVERY toilet is for?" Lou
"THAT'S instead of a toilet brush.... they use water to clean the toilet" Simone
"And why is there no toilet roll?"
"I assumed that they don't poo in public toilets, they wait until they're at home"
So in a country with limited sanitation where dysentery and other diarrhoea inducing diseases are rife, Simone thinks they only poo in the comfort of their own home....
"No No NO they DO NOT use that shower head to clean their bums".....
And so, he wouldn't believe me, we had to resort to google to understand whether the shower head is an alternative to a toilet brush....
Ciao for now.... xxx
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